They're children but thankfully they're not human
We got back to the house pretty late so E fed the dogs and took them out while I got ready for bed. As soon as the pups came back in they ran into the bedroom to settle in for the night. E came in and kept saying he smelled poop but he'd look around and not find anything. I got into bed and smelled it as well so I got up and looked around and found nothing. We finally just blamed the poor cat and his litterbox.
Sneauball ran up in between us to snuggle and we both screamed at the same time. It appears that he felt the need to mask his smell while outside by rolling in fresh poop. So at 10 p.m. E and I were giving Sneauball an impromptu bath. The little booger smells pretty good too because the only shampoo within reach was my $11 bottle of Aveda Rosemary Mint.
Fast forward to 2:30 a.m. I've just gotten to sleep because apparently I can't have caffeine after 6 p.m. anymore. (I'd had a grande hot tea in the bookstore while doing some reading and had the damndest time falling asleep) So at 2:30 I awaken to the sound of a dog crying. Sophie was asleep between my knees and she was shaking a bit so I called to her. She came over and snuggled next to me and I calmed her a bit and we went back to sleep. More dog whining and it's not coming from Sophie. I pick up my head to take a head count - Sophie - check, laying next to me - Nate - check, laying at E's feet - Sneauball - check, laying on the other side of Nate. Hmmmmmmmm...Back to sleep I go. Dog whining yet again, more muffled this time. Ok, another head count. Sophie - check, still laying next to me and looking like I'm seriously disturbing her slumber - Nate - check, still sleeping at E's feet - Sneauball - hey, wait a minute that's not Sneauball laying by Nate, that's Nate's fluffy tail, where the heck is Sneauball??? More muffled whimpering. I turn the light and begin to search the room frantically.
I have to break here to explain that we're currently having an issue with our bedframe. It needs some repairing so our mattress and boxspring are on the floor with the frame still around us. The headboard is above us and there is space between the mattress and the wall so we've stuffed that with pillows.
Finally I find the source of the whining - Sneauball, while sleeping in his favorite spot behind E's head, has managed to slip off the mattess and had gotten wedged between a pillow and the mattress and can't move. His little nose was sticking out from the side of the bed and he was looking at me with this pleading expression in his little eyes. I picked him up and made sure he was no worse for the wear then we both got back into bed where he proceeded to squirm right back up to his favorite spot behind E's head.
This morning I overslept by nearly an hour and Sneauball looked completely refreshed. God knew what he was doing by not giving me human children.